Jam Tarts

This morning I was making some pies and I had some left over crust dough, so I decided to make some jam tarts. We used to make them when I was little and my mom was baking pies. Making them, but most of all eating them, brought back some really fond memories from my childhood. I have this picture in my head of Reed and Mom and I in our kitchen at Thanksgiving time (it must have been Thanksgiving because Mom didn't really make pies that often). Mom is baking in the kitchen, and Reed and I are on the other side of the counter. We roll out the leftover dough, cut it into squares, and put a spoonful of homemade raspberry jam in each square and then pinch the edges shut. Then we put them on a cookie sheet and mom bakes them. I remember that mine were always too big with either way too much jam or way too little. Anyway, just a nice thing I remembered today.

My First Rehersal

Yesterday was the first rehersal for Into the Woods. It was actually just a read through. It turned out to be kind of boring, but I am sure that they will get more interesting. They had technical difficulties with the score CD, so we just sang along with the soundtrack and read through our lines. It took about three hours to get through the play. And of course, I don't have a very big part, so most of the time I was just sitting there.

I was really glad about one thing, though. It turned out that with a lot of the biggest parts, they "split" them so that two people are playing the same part. They will only get to perform every other night! I'm glad that I get to be in every performance.

Speaking of which, for those interested, here are the performance dates: May 4, 5, 7, 11, 12, 14, 18, 19, 21, 25, & 26. Those are all Firdays, Saturdays, or Mondays.

I'm really hoping that I can help with the costuming. I think that would be really fun, too.

Quick Trip to Shriner's

On Monday, Petra and I took a quick trip to Shriner's while Mom watched Talia. Really, we just drove to the hospital and back, we didn't spend any time in SLC, otherwise I would have given you Utahn's a call. I love Shriner's. Some people in our area have implied that it's not as good of a hospital as Primary Children's because it's not affiliated with the Church, but they have been absolutely wonderful to us. Monday, Petra had to have her braces adjusted because they were causing a pressure sore on her left ankle, but the problem was quickly resolved. The orthatist just moved the strap further up her ankle. They have a fun playground outside the hospital and we played there for a couple of minutes before and after the appointment to work the wiggles out. Petra's favorite was the swing. She wanted me to push her as high as I could and did NOT want to stop, even to slide. They have these really cool metal pipes with mallets that play music when you hit them and big drums at the playground, too (it's an outdoor playground!). It also happened to be a truly beautiful day. I enjoyed doing something a little different for once. I am happy staying home, but it's nice to have a change of pace once in a while.

My Talia Bear

Look at these pictures of Talia and myself! I am so proud of the fact that she looks so much like I did. Every time someone saw Petra, they would say, "She looks just like her daddy!". It kind of hurt my feelings. Actually, the part that bothered me was that she has always been such a Daddy's Girl. In the middle of the night, I wasn't the one she called for. If she fell down, she didn't want me. Maybe Talia can be mine. Not that she seems to care all that much who holds her at this point. I think that it will make a big difference that I'm staying home with the girls, though. It already has made a difference with Petra's and my relationship, I think. She no longer cries "I want daddy!" whenever she doesn't get her way.

I'm actually enjoying staying home a lot of the time. But, man, is it hard! I don't think anyone can truly understand how difficult it is until they try it. Trying to keep the house clean without neglecting the girls is practically impossible. I've kind of given up, to tell the truth. I decided that the girl's need my attention a lot more than the kitchen does (not that I'm not trying to keep everything reasonably tidy, it's just not what I would call really clean). And the girls always seem to desperately need my attention at exactly the same time. If Petra wets her pants, Talia is suddenly starving to death. It's triage. Decide who really needs my attention more at that moment. Am I the only one who feels like a newborn's cries indicate a need for urgent attention? It always makes me feel like I've really got to hurry and attend to her when Talia starts screaming. It takes a real effort to ignore her if Petra needs me more.

Now the Fun REALLY Starts!

I just got the call! I am a step-sister--Florinda, I think. Is it awful of me to admit that at first, just for a moment, I was disappointed? It is kind of a small part. But, the more I think about it, the more excited I am. Hey! I got in!!! And, I'm sure that the more I do this, the less nervous I will get, and the more likely I am to be able to get better parts in the future. Besides, this is going to be a lot of fun!!

PS-Thanks for your support!

Call Backs

Yesterday, we were having a really busy day. I had taken Petra to physical therapy, and we went home for a quick lunch before I had to take Talia to the doctor (she had a little cold which I thought was just a little cold, but Petra had suspected pneumonia and Dusty had bronchitis, so I wanted to make sure it really wasn't anything serious [it wasn't]). We were racing to get there on time, with a million other things to do afterwards, when I finally got the call from the theatre (well, 4 days can seem like an eternity!). She wanted me to come back for call backs at 5:45 that night! This was really exciting on the one hand, but really scary on the other hand. A big part of me was hoping that they wouldn't do call back's--I would know yea or nay after only one audition and not have to go through that again. Also, it seemed like all the time, I would ALMOST make it, but not quite. It almost seems worse that way. It was a big part of why I decided to give up on theatre in the first place.

Anyway, once again, I was so nervous that I wanted to throw up. And I just seemed to find so many good excuses not to go through with it. Dusty wouldn't let me, though. I turned the girls over to him after fencing and ran home to change before I went to the theatre (see previous entry for the reasoning). I hadn't even thought about my song since the previous Saturday, so I grabbed the CD to practice in the car again. At first it sounded awful again, but I prayed and went through it a couple more times, and I thought it was okay.

The audition itself was more fun this time. I only had to sing a little, then I read lines with a couple of other women who were a lot of fun. The upshot of it is that I think the three of us are being considered for either Cinderella's Stepmother, Jack's Mother, or the Baker's Wife. Just not the Stepmother, please! I have enough of that in real life!!

(If you want to know my bet, I think that if I get one of those, it will be Jack's Mother, since I'm a soprano, and the other two were altos and that part is definitely the highest. I want the Baker's Wife the most, though).

So, more wait and see. Again. If I thought 4 days was an eternity....!!! Every time the phone rings, my heart rate jumps!!!

Auditioning

When I heard that the Virginia Theater was going to do Into the Woods, at first I was really excited. I could just picture myself as Cinderella, in that beautiful gown, dancing and singing... and my favorite part, the applause at the end. I told Dusty about it, and he was very supportive. But then... I started practicing my song... and I guess it was going okay, but I remembered all of the reasons I gave up on being in plays. I started to get really nervous. What if I made a fool of myself? I was wasting my time--surely I wouldn't make it. The funny thing is, performing the play isn't the scary part to me. I still think that that would be really fun. But auditioning... specifically presenting myself to be judged, where someone will be watching me looking for something specific, and I might not even know what that is... that is really really terrifying to me. When the time came nearer and nearer, and I still didn't really know my song, I gave up. I didn't really decide not to try, I just knew that I wouldn't. I would let the opportunity pass me by, quietly, without acknowledging it, and that would be that. Dusty wouldn't let it happen, though. Two days before the audition, he started pushing me, gently, but in a way that basically told me I had no choice in the matter. "It doesn't matter if you get it," he said. "All that matters is that you try." So be it. I set to really learning my song.

The night before the audition, I had been singing all evening, to a CD (Wicked), to the radio, then I finally started practicing my song, and I was losing my voice. The high notes were okay, but the low notes sounded awful. Yech.

The day of the audition, I got all dressed up. I wore a suit, and my Aunt Dale's diamond necklace. Dusty told me once about how people give you more respect if you look impressive. Plus, I knew I would feel even more like garbage if I showed up looking all grungy. Anyway, I practiced my song only three times, in the car on the way to the theatre, because I was afraid I would start to lose my voice again. The audition itself went pretty well. I was still pretty scared at first. When I've auditioned as an adult, I get nervous in a way that I don't think I have at any other time in my life. It's like my entire body goes numb and I want to break my own finger or something just to feel again (okay, I know I'm really weird). When I was singing, my body was trembling, but I knew that there wasn't anything that I could do about that, so I just focused on remembering all of the words, and trying not to look at anyone (while not looking like I was trying not to look at anyone). After my song, everyone else clapped (as they had for everyone who was auditioning) and one person had even cheered (which they hadn't for anyone else, and I didn't know anyone there so that's good!). Then, they had me read lines. They had me read a lot of lines. More than any of the other auditions than I had watched. The more I read, the less I trembled, and the more fun I started to have.

And, that was it. She said that they would call me with-in a week.